Sunday, April 11, 2010

Badass Quotes

Just to mix it up a bit, some totally badass quotes, many from very evil people:

One death is a tragedy; a million is a statistic - Joseph Stalin

[Upon hearing the suggestion that he should encourage Catholicism to court the Pope during WWII]
The Pope! How many divisions does he have? - Joseph Stalin

Death solves all problems. No man, no problem. - Joseph Stalin

Ideas are more powerful than guns. We don't let our enemies have guns, so why let them have ideas? - Joseph Stalin

[I actually don't agree with this quote (obviously, since agreeing with this would make me a jackass), but find it hilarious nonetheless]
Anyone who sees and paints a sky green and fields blue ought to be sterilized. - Adolf Hitler

Demoralize the enemy from within by surprise, terror, sabotage, assassination. This is the war of the future. - Adolf Hitler

If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed. - Adolf Hitler

The great strength of the totalitarian state is that it forces those who fear it to imitate it. - Adolf Hitler

The victor will never be asked if he told the truth. - Adolf Hitler

Before all else, be armed. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Men should either be treated generously or be destroyed, because they take revenge for slight injuries; for heavy ones, they cannot. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli

I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation. War is hell. - General Sherman

I think I understand what military fame is: to be killed on the field of battle and have your name misspelled in the newspapers. - General Sherman

War is cruelty. There's no use trying to reform it. The crueler it is, the sooner it will be over. - General Sherman

You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog. - Harry S. Truman

I fired MacArthur because he wouldn't respect the authority of the President... I didn't fire him because he was a dumb son of a bitch, although he was, because that's not against the law for generals. If it was, half to three-quarters of them would be in jail. - Harry S. Truman

In Soviet Union it is hard to do comedy. You cannot improvise... if someone heckles you from the audience, you cannot say "your mother wears army boots", because she probably does, and she will hurt you. If you make joke, "take my wife... please", you come home... she's gone. - Yakov Smirnoff

"When I first came here from Russia, I went to Cleveland... In Cleveland, they made me feel at home, so I had to escape again. Now, I make fun of Cleveland because everybody makes fun of Cleveland. In every country they make fun of a particular city. When I was in Russia, for example, we used to make fun of Cleveland. - Yakov Smirnoff

I saw an ad in newspaper, it says "we guarantee your furniture and stand behind it for six months". That's the reason I left Soviet Union! I don't want people behind my furniture! - Yakov Smirnoff

Democracy is different in America. For example, woman can vote but horse cannot. - Borat

Yo, I don't play no games. The only games I play is my dick versus yo' pussy. And my dick always wins. - McCracken, a "friend" of a friend

So this bitch started yelling at me, so I said to myself, "Stay calm, McCracken! Stay calm!" So I pulled out my gun, and I shot him. - McCracken

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